A Mother of Teen Mothers

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¨The most stressful things were the doctor appointments,” said Anne. “They would ask me if I had talked to my girls about safe sex. They made me feel like I was responsible… and I did.¨

Anne was on her way to take her 15-year-old daughter to her first prenatal visit. She ¨felt scared and was ready to be blamed responsible along with getting criticism,¨ Anne continued.

On average, one-third of American girls become pregnant before the age of 20. About 11 percent of pregnancies around the world are teen pregnancies since more than 16 million women between the ages of 15-19 give birth annually. In the United States alone, approximately 410,000 teens gave birth in 2009.

¨The only reason I found out at the time I did was because Alec´s mother asked me to if I could go over to her house because she said she needed to talk to me,¨ Anne said. Alec was Janet´s boyfriend at the time. Anne proceeded, now with tears in her eyes. ¨We went over to her house and sat down with her to talk. It turns out that Alec had told his mother because the idea of being a father at such a young age scared and frightened him. His mom finally told me and said she called us over because I wanted to know if you were aware that your daughter is pregnant.¨

Finding out your teenage daughter has an unplanned pregnancy was not the best of news for Anne. According to her, finding out from another person other than her daughter ¨was like taking a slap to the face.¨

¨I felt like my world collapsed in that very moment,” Anne explained as she looked down at her hands. “It was very shocking and tough to believe my baby would be having one.¨

A couple of months passed and Anne received the news that her other underage daughter, Alison, was pregnant as well.

It was an early school morning when ¨Janet was the one that found out. She told me that Alison had been hiding a stash of her period pads under her bed to make it seem as if she was still getting her period.¨ Anne explained.

¨I tried to talk to Alson when she came back from school that day about what was going on with her but she told me to wait until her boyfriend, John, came over later that evening,” Anne said with a sigh. “And when he finally came, we talked it over and he promised to be responsible from then on and care for my Alison.¨

Finding out the first time was brutal for Anne, and now that she knew both of her teenage girls were pregnant, she felt ¨sad, angry, and confused at the same time.¨

¨I felt disappointed,” Anne said. “I never expected that from them, I had always been open with them, I had talked to them about stuff like that…I gave them my trust and they broke it. ¨Anne hesitated to finish.

Anne felt disappointed and now she had to deal with the emotional toll that would come from having two teenage daughters.

¨I felt like I was going to go crazy,” Anne explained. “I wanted to die, I just couldn´t imagine this was all happening. I still felt disappointed during their pregnancies. I just couldn´t imagine how they would confront all these struggles that would come with being a mom. They had lost their childhood and now they had to give one to their own kids.¨

Anne had felt ¨disappointed¨ at her daughters throughout their pregnancies, but felt completely different when Janet gave birth and she saw her first grandchild.

¨I felt calm after Janet gave birth because, thanks to God, all was well,” Anne said, now with tears in her eyes. “My baby and her own baby were well and healthy. To this day, I´m a very content grandmother. Those babies changed my life.¨