The Viking Post

A Collection of Poems

Christopher Carswell, junior


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LOVE

It can be hard.

To do things you’ve never done.

Ride on a rollercoaster for the first time.

Hike up a mountain.

Ride in an airplane.

Starting a job.

Learning to read.

Learning to write.

Learning to speak.

But the hardest thing to do…

Is to love.

It’s new.

It’s mysterious.

It’s exhilarating!

But what makes it hard…

Is when it ends.

It hurts.

Like a knife being dug into your skin.

But that still doesn’t quite match the pain.

I’ve been told.

Told that It’s better to have loved than to have never loved at all.

But is it quite true?

To have loved…

Makes me think,

“What did I do wrong?”

But the first time isn’t the worst.

No, It’s all the times after that.

You know the pain of falling in love.

But none of us can help it.

We’re only human.

And to be human is to crave love.

You fall in love.

Then break again.

Over and over again.

In this twisted game called life.

 

NOBODY

I’m just a Nobody.

Who fell in love with a somebody.

I want to become a somebody for you.

I’m just here.

I wanna be there.

With you in my arms.

I love you and only you.

So what do i do?

I’m just a Nobody.

Always been a Nobody.

I’m never noticed.

Looked over.

You’re a Somebody.

Who is worth something.

I’m a Nobody.

Who made his world all about a Somebody.

Here I am.

And there you are.

Far away.

I have a long way to go.

Because I’m a Nobody.

But I’m begging.

Please wait for me.

And I’ll become your Somebody…

 

I’VE BEEN, I AM 

I’ve been.

Been everything I could be.

I’ve been an astronaut flying in space.

But now I’m someone who has an ugly face.

I’ve been an adventurer, exploring the wild.

But now I’m someone who acts like a crocodile.

 

In the past.

I’ve tried to be.

All these things.

All of the things that used to make me…

Me.

 

But now I’m not.

Not the same.

I’ve felt the pain.

Pain of being alone.

Pain of being forgotten.

And thrown away.

 

WHAT TO DO

I don’t know what to do.

What to say.

What to see.

What to be.

But here I am

On my knees.

I miss you, but you don’t miss me.

I loved you but i guess I didn’t see.

That you hated me.

I’m always the one who loves more.

The one who puts their hand out for you to grab.

The one who is always happy.

 

But behind closed doors.

I’m alone.

Forgotten.

And in pain.

I cry.

I die a little on the inside.

But they don’t see.

You don’t see.

That I’m hurting.

Hurting so bad.

 

I can smile in your face.

But you’ve never asked me, “What’s the case?”

I can laugh.

But you never laugh back.

I can try.

Try everything.

 

But I fail.

Never succeed.

So why bother trying.

If the same thing is going to happen.

It’ll never end.

A cycle of me loving.

And then breaking.

So why bother.

Getting out of bed.

To see the faces of the ones you dread.

To be ashamed of yourself due to other’s company.

 

THE SIGN

So I’ll leave you be.

Just to make you happy.

Nothing left to say…

Except goodbye.

Why can’t you see.

I’m there

Waving at you through the window.

Holding up the sign.

The sign that expresses my love for you.

It’s a beautiful sign.

Made especially for you.

But you turn around.

Away from the sign.

I want you to see it.

To see the amount of love and hard work i tried to put into its beauty.

I put the sign down.

My arms becoming tired from waving it around.

Now i’m just looking through.

Hoping for you to look back.

I’ll stop.

But i want you to know that i’ll be looking through this window.

Until you look back.

Then i’ll come inside to you.

To show you the sign.

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A Collection of Poems