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Look At Yourself You’re Beautiful

Tabitha Solis, Staff Writer, Student Life Editor

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I remember the day vividly. Nine year old me, standing on a cold, dusty weight scale after the first time I was called fat. I knew I wasn’t exactly skinny, but I wasn’t exposed to the word “fat” yet.

42 percent of girls first through third grade want to be thinner, according to DoSomething.org.

Hearing the degrading word at such a young age made me feel disgusted of my own skin. The feeling of my stomach growling at me, to this day, still always brings memories back. “You’re not that hungry! Don’t eat that. You really want to hate yourself even more?” These are the things I used to tell myself until I was happy enough with my body. Hopping into the warmth of my parent’s bed when the thoughts became too much to bare alone. Since being first exposed to those feelings, I have not been able to feel the same way about myself.

 

We all see things from a different perspective, which includes ourselves. Some of us want to change the things we can’t change about ourselves the most. On our screens we constantly adore those with the clearest of skin and the nicest of bodies. Some don’t necessarily need to know the feeling of being put down; sometimes it’s just the standards that spawn the self-hate. We cannot escape the fact that most of us want to achieve the perfect body image. Some work on their bodies to the max until they feel they are good enough and some just continue to self-loathe, aching about how they wish they were something they’re not.

 

It was the beginning of the year, I minded my own business, looking down, playing with my split ends quickly looking up after being tapped on my shoulder. “Do you see that girl? She’s body goals isn’t she? Why are you being so serious.. you can’t take a joke?”, said the boy pointing at the girl in which in his eyes was the perfect target. He continued snickering when she turned around looking at him with the hurt in her eyes, you could easily tell what her eyes were saying, “Not this again.”

 

Body Image Statistics states 80 percent of women say that the images of women on television and in movies, fashion magazines, and advertising makes them feel insecure. For Karina Garcia, sophomore, this was the case. She sees girl with the type of bodies people obsess over and falls into a state of deep self consciousness. “I wish I had more of a flat stomach, skinny face, and curves. Unfortunately I have none of those things, so I look at everyone else, including my friends and it upsets me.”  She concludes that the people who love and care about her see her as beautiful and nothing more, but in most cases she doesn’t really believe that. Although she has some days where she feels like nothing could make her feel less than beautiful, a part of that insecure girl still hangs in there.

 

“I used to be a really fat kid. Like, chubby and overweight. I hated it so much.”, said Damian Iyescas, sophomore. He never worried about people viewing him the way he did himself, it was always just him putting himself down. He believes everyone is self conscious even if they don’t show it, some have it worse than others.

 

Seeing people who have nice bodies and are idealized for it can make you look yourself up and down. Not everyone lets it get to them but when they do… they do.

 

Some people take it to the extreme and end up purging. Purging is a term that means self-induced vomiting, misuse of laxatives, diuretics, or enemas to control weight or shape in the absence of binge eating episodes that occur in people with normal or near-normal weight.

 

According to Body Image Center, 95 percent of people with eating disorders are between the ages of 12 and 25.

 

Monica Flores was in the fourth grade when she remembers looking in the mirror and being flooded with an an overwhelming feeling of disdain and disgust at who she was. She remembers twiddling her fingers, her feet still not able to reach the floor while she sat in a chair waiting for her therapist to call her in. “My depression definitely went hand in hand with my eating disorder.” Flores said. They were like best friends. Then, my eating disorder ended up being my best friend, my only friend.”

 

According to DoSomething.org, only 10 percent of people suffering from an eating disorder will seek professional help. Now in her sophomore year, still in her own small world Flores is now home-schooled and the only thing keeping her sane is her music, art, books, her friends, and her dog. In bed, she still cries into her pillow wishing she could be normal instead of drowning in loneliness while feeling her dog’s soft fur to remember she’s not completely alone.

 

We all have something that keeps us going enough to not fall too deep into the body image issue. We all have someone we can go to at the end of the day to make us feel enlightened and forget about all the harsh things. People may argue they have no one but that’s not true there are people all around, remember not everyone wants to judge but wants to help. It’s okay to be self conscious. These feelings take time to go away. Pick up your phone, go on google, and type “body image” or “self conscious”. I can guarantee you there are thousands of people who are going through what you are.

 

“I think the most important thing to note is that you’re not alone and that things could get better if you want them to.”, Iyescas said.

 

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The student news site of Moreno Valley High School
Look At Yourself You’re Beautiful